Outside the Tribe: Taking a Walk in Right Direction to Help the Great Cause Behind DHFS5K
By Chris Johnson on June 09, 2024 from Outside the Tribe
- First of all, there is something lost in the translation from kilometers to miles. Mile 1 of the DHFS5K is at least 17 miles, according to my hamstrings. Mile 2 is at least double the length of Mile 1. Mile 3, is actually not bad at all. So, again according to my hamstrings, a 5K is really about 52 miles. That of course means Saturday’s overall winner, Aidan Kneeland (with a time of 16:10.87) can run roughly three miles a minute. I realize that is impossible for a human being so I blame the metric system.
- People who are good at running and take it seriously, they show up for a race and run before it starts. Then after the race is over, they run some more. Insiders call this warming up and cooling down. I call it voluntary torture.
- Did you know there were hills on the 5K course? Not metaphorical hills to climb, I’m talking real-life in-person inclines. That hill right by Compton Park? I might as well of been scaling Mt. Everest.
- My time of 54:49.12, is also the pace one must run the course and be able to get to The Lunchbox Food Truck in time to secure an order of Filipino Eggrolls. Seriously, after I placed my order they came out and marked on their chalk board that there were sold out. I offer no apologies for getting the last ones because they were delicious.
- If you complete the DHFS5K course in my time of 54:49.12 you can do so while listening to Dokken’s new album, 1.5 times.
- Post-race, three is the number of cramps I’ve discovered in places I didn’t realize you could get cramps. The night is still young, that number could very well increase.